1. Hills are your friends* and mountains are your mates.

2. No point in being built for show and not for go.  Don’t talk the talk, if you can’t walk the walk.  The bullshit stops when the flag drops.  And never bullshit a bullshiter.

3. Putting the pedal to the metal up hills, is generally safer than throttling down 'em!

4. You are on this Earth to help your fellow man.  But, have as much fun as you can whilst you help her.

5. Don’t take yourself too seriously, ‘cause other Muggs will generally take the Mickey out of you, if you do.

6. Cycling and imbibing a wee dram aren't good bedfellows.  Get out of one bed before you slip into the other. 

7. Encourage the idiosyncratic and extreme.  And don't lose your fire, 'cause that is who you are!

8. Drafting other Muggs on down hills is a mortal sin - serious shit, punishable by excommunication, and not giving at least one metre clearance when overtaking is taboo.

9. Cycle single file on single lane roads when there is an unbroken centre line, thereby avoiding the one-out 'death seat', which will help you avoid the ire of RedNecks and 'ipso facto' keep the rubber side down.

10. Don’t be a tight arse when the bill comes around, ‘cause only fish need one.

          *      (David Seaton circa Tasmania Ride, Jan 1997)