Muggaccinos Pedlars Sunday Cyclists - The Bullsheet

  1. This Sunday, 27 August, Daylight Saving 8:30am "delayed start" 'cause its really only 7:30am - Breakfast at Brooklyn on the Pier - 82 kms

THE RAINMAN is Sig [‘phone 0407 914 224]. Riders from either starting point should arrive at Brooklyn Pier for brunch around 10:25am where the MoKador is only average, with a 2nd pit stop at Pie in the Sky for Segafredo [8 out of 10] at 11:50am, returning to Turra' at 1:40pm:

  • Longer Ride - 82kms
    Arrive Turramurra car park [    North/East side of station] by 8:20am for an 8:30am departure in/out of Bobbin Head, arriving at Kalkari Reserve after 14kms around 9:10am for a brief breather. We take a right onto the Pac Highway at the lights after passing Asquith Golf Course. Then it is due north to the Hawkesbury where we right turn at Brooklyn Rd [about 400 metres short of old Brooklyn Bridge] around 10:15am for the 4kms saunter into Brooklyn where we brunch on the Pier outside the Red Herring Fish Shop.
  • Shorter Ride [54kms]
    Arrive at Hornsby car-park [    100 metres Nth/West of the Railway Hotel in Jersey St] by 9am for a 9:10am roll out cycling 600 metres north up Jersey St, taking a short left, followed by a right 60 metres later [at traffic lights] onto Old Pacific Highway for the 27kms ride to the fish shop.

If the weather is sunny, the glistening blue water of Brooklyn provides a delightful ambience to fill one's face. We should commence our return from 11:10 am, with a helter skelter sprint back to Pie in the Sky where the KOM will likely be fiercely contested, even though it is not a race, arriving at the scenic grassy knoll just before midday for a 2nd caffeine fix on Segafredo and pies with real meat - [Famous Robertsons Pie Shop take note!]

Allowing for a 20 min 2nd pit stop should evidence the caravan returning at -

  • 1:40pm at Turra'; or
  • 1pm at Hornsby.

      2. Brenda's rap up of Cinque Montagnes anti-clockwise [100.2kms] sub-titled "MATCH OF THE DAY / OLD BANGERS STRUT THEIR STUFF"

A passer-by at T’murra car park at eight bells on a warm winter’s day would have been excused for musing that something was seriously amiss. The scene was a large, excited and circuitous group omitting lots of oohs and aahs. The object of all this excitement was PJ, a flush with pride and pleasure as everyone had their eyes on his "equipment" and boy were they green with envy!

The brand new smickers MONGOOSE was being unveiled.

For Phil’s information a mongoose of the animal variety resembles a ferret, not a dopey looking North American deer as he thought during a chat at Pie in the Sky, but back to that later.

          Poor Phil, he’s such a Goose,

          All this study – his brain’s unhinged – its come Loose,

          ‘Cos he can’t tell the difference between a small furry mammal,

          And a Bloody Great MOOSE!

It was time to leave the locker room. The ref blew his whistle and the team of eleven (anyone for soccer?) made their way towards the first hill to be tackled. Big Cog Mark and Rabbit Warren scored KOM equally throughout the day. You could say their hard earned efforts resulted in a draw. Although they were sorely challenged more than once by Pacific Pete, a no-nonsense player if ever there was one, hard tackler, who often leads the hit-ups.

There were lots of vintage vehicles for us to feast our eyes on whilst we were scooting up the OPH during the first half of the ‘match’. First off came Puffing Billy the Steam Train Toot-tooting us in its wake, and reminding us that Train’s the way to go. Shortly afterwards we were spectators to a stationary showcase of Minis and Morris’ (M & M’s of the non chocolate variety). Then later on, amidst brill sunshine and blue water, we shared the Punt at Berowra Waters with an array of Datsun Sport Cars of a bygone era.

Was it any wonder that those of us born in the Fabulous Fifties were overcome with nostalgia? A time to reminisce…Remember when:

          A porn shop was a pawn shop?

          McDonalds was a farm and a ‘Big Mac’ was an oversized raincoat?

          We got married first – then lived together?

          Going all the way’ meant staying on the train ‘til it reached the depot?

          A ‘gay’ person was the life and soul of the party?

          There were only three different types of toilet paper

          The Sydney Morning Herald, The Australian and

          The Manly Daily?

I could go on and on (in fact I just did).

Back to the pitch and the next scene was the mad scramble uphill from the Punt towards the half-time mark at the nursery/coffee shop. Mark, Warren and Pete T. being first to towel down at this point. After sipping our coffees and slurping our soups (wasn't that white china something special?), we bade farewell to the proprietor as he was kind enough to come out and check us in person (or was he just making sure that we had attended to the other sort of check?)

On the descent into Galston Gorge, The Smiling Assassin made his play and swooped into action. He overtook The Widget on a sharp bend and came closer to her leg than her Gillette ladies razor on shave days. What a fright for both of them as it transpired a large truck was oncoming and it was in the same piece of road as Sig. He had to make his move fast, even if it meant a foul on his own team-mate.

Widget resorted to her sort of tactics and later on retaliated along the ‘straights’ when she deftly led him through a series of potholes (which he successfully bunny hopped over – drat!).

At the full-time mark back at the car park this writer declares Siggy the overall winner. Unfortunately, that pesky pair Big Cog Mark and Rabbit Warren were already first into the showers and discussing the highlights.

However, Man of the Match went to Mark of Coogee for the incredible effort of staying with the team the entire day despite the indisputable disadvantage of riding on fat knobbly tyres on an old clunker with a gynormous back pack. Rumour has it he's about to invest in a new mountain bike to tackle the Simpson Desert trail. The Flash gets the Good Sportsman pewter for waiting for Mark so he wouldn't get lost.

The outstanding strip award went to Elfi (for looking great in her colourful gear not for what she does in private).

Master of the dummy runs went to Phil.

To sum up, we all done bloody good!

      N.B. Ann is soon to embark on an offshore adventure to Ireland where we’re sure she’ll be sure to have a great time, begorrah!

Boy boy from The Welsh Widget 'n The Scribe 21 August 2000 johnstph@cba.com.au