MUGGACCINO Pedlars Sunday Cyclists - The Bullsheet

This Sunday, 13 August Cinque Montagnes anti-clockwise [100.2kms] or Two Hills Ride [46kms] first stop Pie in the Sky after 41kms at 10:10am

THE RAINMAN is Sig [‘phone 0407 914 224]. Both below ride start points to arrive at Pie in the Sky by 10:10am:

Longer Ride - Cinque Montagnes [100.2kms]
Arrive Turramurra car park [North/East side of station] by 7:50am for an 8am departure in/out of Bobbin Head, arriving at Kalkari Reserve after 14kms around 8:40am for a brief breather. We take a right onto the Pac Highway at the lights after passing Asquith Golf Course. Then it is due north the Hawkesbury where we U turn at Brooklyn Rd around 9:50am for the delightful climb back to the pie shop for brunch.

Shorter Rides - Two Hills [46kms] or Three Hills with Brooklyn leg [76kms]
Arrive at Hornsby car-park [100 metres Nth/West of the Railway Hotel in Jersey St] by 8:35m for a 8:45am roll out cycling 600 metres north up Jersey St, taking a short left, followed by a right 60 metres later [at traffic lights] onto Old Pacific Highway for the 26kms ride to the pie shop.

Around 10:30am, depending on the weather, we return south for about 20kms before taking a right into Berowra Waters Rd where we descend to picturesque Berowra Waters for the ride on the punt. [If you’ve had enough, you can stop at “Two Hills” by continuing south and return to either Hornsby [46kms] or Turra’ [76kms] car parks]. After cycling thru rural Berrilee and Arcadia, our lunch-time pit stop is at Green Shades Nursery Café at Galston [9653.1500ph] (don't forget 10% surcharge) from 11:20am - the restaurant management is comfortable with us leaving our bikes outside the rest rooms and inside the green metal doors on the LHS. However, as it will be approaching lunch-time, we might struggle to get a table, in which case it will likely be lunch at the small shop at the gas station across the street.

Around midday, we commence our return home via Galston George. Our ETR is 2:10pm, with 100.2kms on the computer and five hills on the ledger. The ride is 74kms from Hornsby with only three hills - expected back by 1:40pm.

Brenda’s unplugged rap-up of Sunday, 6 August, “The Tough GET Tougher But The Wusses GET To Stay In Bed"

Brenda took her job, as rain woman quite literally on this week’s ride as showers seemed to be the order of the day. It was a sad and sorry turnout at Snives Car Park smack on eight bells. Only three Muggs (not even enough for a full T-set) everyone else must have taken a peak out the window and decided to put in a no-show, albeit several of the regulars had earlier proffered bona fide excuses, however, Simmo wasn't one of 'em.

Things started to look up when Pacific Pete tagged on at the Terrey Hills turn-off. Even better when we encountered Dieter a bit further up the street, where, fast as a rabbit, Warren got to display his prowess not just at cycling but at changing his dud tube. The crew slipped into ‘Norman the Foreman’ mode and happily stood by watching. After all, it was figured as he works for NRMA, he’d be pretty adept at kerbside mechanics by now.

On her numerous jaunts to West Head, Brenda had often been privy to some of the wilder sights of the bush (kangaroos etc.). However, nothing had prepared her for this visual affront to her optical senses. Amongst some parked cars at the entrance to the national park were a few cyclists finishing up after their ride. One such dude was getting out of his wet strides and poor BB was treated to the sight of one very big, bent- over bare bottom. The cheek of it! Fortunately Dieter was on hand to proffer her some smelling salts before she was completely overcome by shock. (At least that’s what he imagined her shaky condition to be.)

Half way there and the pleasant light drizzle we had been coping with, now turned into a very unpleasant downpour. Dieter, in his infinite wisdom did an ‘about turn’ and headed for base. Or was it a huge guilt complex brought about by his sneaking off from home this morning, unbeknown to unhappy Helga who’s not capable of riding just yet?

Pacific Pete was sorely tempted to follow suit, but was prevented from by the certain knowledge that his reputation would smack a thrashing in the ‘Bullsheet’. Smiling Sig, can attest only too well to the stigma that sticks like dog s*** to a smelly sandshoe after an intimidatory blast within that dubious publication which Simmo christened.

Meanwhile, the mist was very…well ‘misty’ and Widget was totally unaware that she had completed the two sticky hill climbs at the end that she had been dreading. What happened? Had Aliens taken her? More likely she was just daydreaming about food again. On the final downhill to the Lookout the boys very kindly humoured her ego and let her overtake them in order that she could procure the highly sought after QOM.

After taking in the splendid view, albeit a dampish one and gobbling down our goodies, who should appear but Backpacker Bruce. He must have cycled faster than a cut cat on a hot tin roof. It transpired he’d reached St Ives at 8.30 a.m. and didn’t know where the meeting place was. A quick call to Sig soon put him on the right track though.

Whilst we were waiting for him to eat his banana, someone noticed that Phil wasn’t with us. Not a hard mistake to make as P.J. has his own agenda and often leaves before the rest and best of us. Where was he?

What could possibly have accounted for his absence? Widget was sworn to secrecy so she couldn’t possibly tell. But what the heck. She did anyway!

So it was, that on pondering P.J.’s recent plight, that Widget Hood and her bunch of Merry Men set off for their first coffee fix at the Portafino Café, Akuna Bay. At said place we sat in the café and partook, not only of a cracking lunch - hearty, wholesome, cheap and chunky, but percipient conversation too, such as who had the wettest socks, gloves etc.

The café boasted another luckless cyclist, an intrepid chappie from Merseyside called Ron. An absolute mine of information and stories emanated from him and we soon discovered that he had probably peddled more clicks in the universe than any of us could possibly have done by car. Naturally we passed on the necessary exclusive Muggaccino entry form to him and showed him where to put his ‘x’ for m’ship.

After another cuppa, we all decided that the weather was far too inclement to carry on to Warriewood, so we piked out of the last leg and hoofed it homewards instead - exactly 65.7kms. Bruce had important Olympic business to attend to anyway and it wasn't deemed safe for Mark to continue riding on his innertubes in such bad weather, it appears he forgot his tyres again this week .

Sunday’s edition of the Sun Herald. Page 107, reports the results of the 45 kilometre race of Macarthur Collegians at Menangle. Amidst a field barely exceeding a dozen, 2^nd place was Siggy Hoffmann, but wait for it, the 3rd and most coveted position was won by none other than our very own Phil Johnston. What champs!